For all those that believe paying through the nose for watered-down drinks and being treated like cattle is conducive to having a good time.

Stuck in the burger van, char-grilling the back of his hand
“Do you want onions on that or what, mate?”
So bored, he rubs a tin, chilli sauce into weeping skin
The screams echo down the vomit-lined streets of Yate

Let’s go to Spirals - to get on down
Keep warm, cause trouble - all over town

Car parks, alleyways, bogs, cars jam-packed with yobs
Revved up engines poised to do a lap
Under-age girls sit chewing gum and the boys have so much fun
Smashing bus stops, phone boxes, street lights and town maps

Let’s go to Spirals - to get on down
Keep warm, cause trouble - all over town

Spirals takes the piss, when it sends out free tickets
For the tub of lard on the door to make a stand
By the hair of his sixteen chins, won’t budge to let me in
“We have low standards but we don't have no standards”

Let’s go to Spirals - to get on down
Keep warm, cause trouble - all over town

A slightly different version of Spirals was originally recorded by Todd's Peace Box.


A Friend in Need is a Pest
Air-Con One
@ Fuck
Another Boring Eastfield Song
Beast of Bratislava
Big Brother
Broad Street Trash
Burt Reynolds Rides Again
Bury Vic Berry
Cancer of the Universe
Chiddingfold General
CI5 Revisited
Cigarettes and Tourettes
Come to Bevland
David Icke
Drive on Henry
Don't Phone Back
Eate Yourself Dead
Eddie Watson
Elvis is Dead and Jazz is Shit
Everything is Marvellous
Fare Dodging
Fortuna Hell
Get a Grip
God's Plastic Railway
Grant the Lumberjack (old)
Grant the Lumberjack (new)
Grica Hate
Hearing Nothing About a Revolution
How to Rip Off Your Band Mates
Hucknal! Get Out of my Car!
Humour Exclusion Zone
It's Gotta be a Record Breaker
Jeremy's Dream
John's Not Mad
Jostick Head
Jumping Someone Else's Train
Just Like the Sixties
Keep on Tracking the Train
La Jonquera
Mick Murphy's Dirty Bar
Milton of Leys
Money Money Money Money
Mr. Willis
Off the Rails
Pedigree Scum
Peace and Love Muthafucka
Plastic Buddha (Kwai)
Port Talbot Transport Police
Radio West
Rod, Hull and Emo
Sharks Against Surfers
Sky Burial at Warton Crag
Summer Hill Blues
The Black Hole (Fekete Ut)
The Cult of Ted Moult
The Gasman
The Second Fastest Cycle Courier in London
Three Chords Good, Four Chords Bad
Three Seats
Todd Landers
Tudor House Painter
Weston Super Scare
Why do people sing about riots?

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